Choosing a masturbator

Most masturbators are bought on the picture and regretted on the third use, usually for one of two reasons: the texture is far more aggressive than it looked, or nobody explained how to dry the thing. Both are easy to get right, and this guide is about how.

Open sleeve, cased stroker or automatic

An open sleeve is open at both ends, cheap, easy to clean and easy to see through. You control the grip with your hand, which makes it the most adjustable type and the most forgiving of a wrong texture.

A cased stroker puts the sleeve inside a hard shell with a cap at the end. Closing the cap builds suction on the out stroke, and that suction is the thing most people are actually buying. It is also the type that needs the most care, because the sleeve has to come out and dry.

An automatic or hands-free model strokes, rotates or pulses by itself. Worth it if you want to keep your hands out of it or you have limited grip; less about texture, more about rhythm and the fact that it runs on its own.

A penis sleeve is a different thing altogether: it goes on for partnered sex, to add girth or length, not to be used alone.

What the texture actually does

The inside is where the money goes. Fine ribs and small nubs feel closest to skin. Large ribs, spirals and hard bumps are intense, and intense stops being pleasant sooner than the packaging suggests.

Tight first chambers are the reason a sleeve feels strong at the entry and ordinary further in. If you want the whole length to feel like something, look for a texture that changes through the tunnel rather than a single pattern repeated.

If this is your first one, buy a mild texture. A too strong sleeve can be softened only by using less suction, while a too gentle one can always be tightened with the cap or with your hand.

Tightness and length

Insertable length matters more than total length. Anything from fifteen centimetres inside covers most people, and a shorter sleeve is not a problem as long as the last part is not a hard end cap.

Diameter is where the feel comes from. A narrow tunnel is gripping and can be too much with a strong texture; a wider one relies on suction to give any sensation at all.

A cased model with an adjustable cap solves most of this: open the cap for less suction, close it for more.

Materials

Sleeves are made of a soft elastomer, sold as TPE, TPR or under a brand name such as SuperSkin. These materials are soft and stretchy in a way silicone cannot match, which is exactly why they are used, and they are porous, which means they cannot be sterilised.

That is not a reason to avoid them; it is a reason to keep one sleeve for one person, wash it after every use, dry it completely, and replace it when it turns sticky or starts to smell. A year or two of regular use is normal.

Silicone strokers exist and are non-porous and easier to keep clean, and they feel firmer and less skin-like. If you would rather have the hygiene than the realism, take silicone. Our guide on body-safe materials goes through the differences properly.

Lubricant, and only one kind

Use a water-based lubricant and nothing else. Silicone lubricant attacks silicone toys, and oil degrades elastomer sleeves and is impossible to rinse out of a porous material.

Use more than you think. A masturbator with too little lubricant drags, and dragging on a soft sleeve is how tears start.

Reapply during rather than adding more at the start. Warm water over the outside of a cased model beforehand takes the chill off and makes a noticeable difference.

Cleaning, and the part everyone skips

Rinse the sleeve through with warm water straight after use, from both ends if it is open, then wash with a mild unscented soap or a toy cleaner. No boiling water, no dishwasher, no alcohol.

Drying is what decides how long the sleeve lasts. Shake it out, then leave it somewhere airy, not back in its case. A drying rack or a rolled paper towel held inside for the first hour does the job. A sleeve put away damp grows mould, and that is the end of it.

When a TPE sleeve dries, the surface turns slightly tacky. That is normal and it is fixed with a pinch of renewing powder, which is plain cornstarch. Talc is not the same thing and does not belong on a sex toy.

The rest of the department

A cock ring keeps blood where it is wanted and makes an erection firmer and longer; it is the cheapest upgrade in this whole department.

Prostate toys reach a spot about five centimetres in on the front wall, and the curve is the entire point. Read anal play for beginners first if that is new territory.

Penis pumps give a temporary swelling and are a used-with-care item: short sessions, low pressure, stop at any pain.

Torsos and dolls are the same material question as sleeves, with more surface to dry and a lot more weight to store.

Storing it out of sight

Keep the sleeve out of direct sunlight and away from other soft toys, because elastomers react with each other and leave marks. A cotton bag or a storage case is enough.

A cased model stores inside its own shell once everything is bone dry, which is also why the drying step cannot be rushed.

Frequently asked questions