Oil-Based & Massage

Oil based products are the ones that glide longest and feel richest: massage oils, oil based lubricants, coconut based glides and the warming oils that heat with breath. They are for massage, for hand play and for anyone who finds water based gels dry out too fast. They are also the category with the most rules, because oil and latex do not mix and oil and silicone toys do not either. This guide explains what oil does well, where it must not go, and how to choose one.

What oil does well

Oil does not dry, does not turn tacky and does not need reapplying, which makes it the natural choice for a long massage or long hand play. It leaves skin soft. Plant oils, sweet almond, jojoba, coconut, are gentle on most skin and smell of little; scented and warming oils add fragrance and a heat that builds with friction and breath.

Where oil must not go

Oil destroys latex: condoms, dental dams, latex gloves and latex clothing weaken and tear on contact, and a condom exposed to oil cannot be trusted. Oil coats silicone toys and, over time, degrades them. Oil inside the vagina upsets the balance and can lead to infection, and it is hard to wash out. So: oil for massage and external play, a water based or silicone lubricant for anything with a condom, a silicone toy or penetration.

Choosing

For massage, a plain plant oil or a scented blend; for a kissable finish, an edible one. For warming, a warming oil, tested on the wrist first. For a glide that behaves like oil but is safe with condoms, look at the silicone lubricants instead, which last as long and do not harm latex.

Using it

Warm a little between the hands, spread, add as needed. Put a towel down, because oil marks sheets. Wash off with warm water and a little soap before anything that involves a condom or a silicone toy.

Care

Keep bottles closed and out of sunlight; plant oils go rancid over a year or so, and the smell tells you. Wipe the outside of the bottle so the cap does not stick.

Frequently asked questions