Remote Control Eggs

A remote control egg is a small vibrator worn inside, with the control in someone else's hand. The egg itself is simple; what people buy it for is the handing over of control, at home or in public, and the game that follows. The things that matter are how well it stays in, how quiet it is, how far the remote reaches, and whether the motor does anything through a body and a layer of clothes.

Cord, remote or app

Eggs on a cord have the control at the end of a wire; cheap, reliable, and only for the wearer or a partner within arm's reach. Remote eggs use a radio remote that works within five to ten metres through clothing and a body, which covers a room, a restaurant table or a car. App eggs use Bluetooth to a phone and the internet beyond that, for control from anywhere; expect the occasional drop, and choose one that keeps running when the connection goes. A remote with a physical button is easier to use discreetly than a phone.

Staying in

An egg sits in the vagina and is held there by the muscles. Larger eggs, around four centimetres, stay put better; very small ones drift. A retrieval cord or loop is essential, both for getting it out and for safety. Some eggs have a curved shape or a small external arm that helps them stay in place and adds clitoral contact; those are the ones for walking about in.

Motor and what is felt

Internal vibration is felt most at the entrance and, through the front wall, at the clitoris and urethra. A rumbly, low frequency motor carries through tissue; a buzzy one is barely noticed once the egg is in, and many cheap eggs disappoint for exactly that reason. Look for a motor described as deep or rumbly, five or more levels, and a low setting that is genuinely low for public use.

Noise

Inside the body an egg is very quiet; on a hard chair the vibration transmits and can be heard. Sit on something soft, keep to the lower levels in public, and test at home under clothes before trusting it anywhere else.

Battery

Rechargeable eggs charge with a magnetic contact or a sealed USB port and run for one to two hours. Remotes use a coin cell that lasts months. Charge before going out; a flat egg mid evening ends the game.

Waterproof and material

The egg should be fully waterproof and made of platinum silicone or smooth ABS plastic with a silicone coat, with no seams where a cord joins the body. Avoid jelly or soft plastic eggs; they cannot be sterilised and they smell within weeks.

Care

Wash with warm water and mild soap after every use, taking care around the cord join and the charging contacts. Water based lubricant only. Dry fully and store apart from other silicone.

Frequently asked questions